50+ Light-hearted Jokes That Have Since Turned Dark
On the internet, there are a myriad of court jesters who enjoy making people laugh with their witty humor. There’s no denying that these people can sometimes go too far with a joke. The following jokes were shared on social media, and just when you think it’s a harmless joke, it completely deviates. Here are a few sketchy internet jokes that started out innocently.
Til’ Death Do Us Part
Only one of two things can happen in a relationship. You’re doomed to spend the rest of your life with that one person, regardless. Or you may have known from the start that you would have to part ways at some point due to a time limit. Not to mention the possibility that one of you will die first. This guy died on the day he proposed to his girlfriend, according to the joke. Well, it’s a classic!
Things Are Getting Coyote Ugly
Many people are not suited to owning a cat. Those of us who do, on the other hand, are captivated by those pulsing, breathtaking eyes. That’s why hearing stories like this makes us so angry.
Things Are Getting Coyote Ugly
We can laugh at someone who is completely unaware that they are wreaking havoc on their neighborhood’s feline population. And at last, a few people will be amused by how the guy tells the story on Twitter.
Delivery or Takeaway?
There will undoubtedly be some locations where delivery personnel feel compelled to visit more very often than others. This could also apply to doctors, if you think about it. Why does this ambulance keep returning to the same spot? Is it normal for an elderly person to trip and fall every now and then?
Delivery Or Takeaway?
What if there’s something far more sinister going on here? As if multiple homicides had taken place in the same place. We’ll assign the task of determining what’s going on to you.
Lights, Camera, Live-Action
Many people are becoming increasingly opposed to zoos as time goes on. In theory, seeing a wide variety of animals is a pleasurable experience. Given the poor living conditions in zoos, you’d think they’d be happier in the where they originally lived.
Lights, Camera, Live Action
On two levels, this joke is comedy gold. For one thing, Disney movies about sad animals have become a common trope, and for another, well, you know what we mean.
Best Girlfriend Ever!
Nobody wants to find out their significant other is cheating on them when it’s too late. Some adultery victims, on the other hand, appear to be more relaxed than others. When the next person found a random guy in his cheating girlfriend’s closet, he took things to a whole new level.
Best Girlfriend Ever!
Fortunately, he was able to see the bright side of things, emphasizing some of the things he would normally find useful. Something else, however, is going on beneath the surface…
The Calm After the Storm
We would like to think that when a bad storm devastates a community, the victims band together and help one another. Some people, on the other hand, are only concerned with themselves.
The Calm After The Storm
Consider this man, who was content to simply pack his belongings and leave his neighborhood. He didn’t mind letting them pick up the pieces while he was relaxing in Hawaii.
Self Drive and Kicking
Machines seem to be progressively trying to rule the world, one upgrade at a time. This is also true in the automotive market. Self-driving cars will become the norm in the future, whether we want them to or not.
Self Drive And Kicking
But, do you know what’s the scariest part? People will surely die while driving, but the car will be completely unaware of this and will continue to drive the body. This joke draws attention to this ominous future event.
Too Soon
It happens from time to time when one’s name is the subject of a good old joke. Everything has its time and place, and there are plenty of times when it isn’t. When attending a funeral, it’s obvious that using someone’s name in jest is inappropriate.
Too Soon
With that in mind, this person couldn’t pass up the opportunity to capitalize on the link between his Uncle Joe’s cremated remains and his mother’s desire to drink coffee. Because, well, it’s basically a box of Joe.
Abstract Daddy Issues
You may well not realize that a social media post is simply someone making light of a serious issue they’ve been dealing with for a long time. That’s exactly what this person did.
Abstract Daddy Issues
He truly concocted something strange and macabre. The truth is that no matter how abstract or depressing your writing is, someone somewhere on the internet will be able to relate to it.
The School of Hard Knocks
Valentine’s Day can be a nightmare for people of all ages. However, celebrating the romantic holiday at school has its own set of challenges. Someone will always get left behind in class, while others will be paired up with others.
The School Of Hard Knocks
This teacher had a lovely way of comforting her students who hadn’t received anything for Valentine’s Day. There was one child, however, about whom she didn’t need to inquire. That’s a lot of audacity!
Tough Love
To provide some context, R20 refers to South Africa’s currency if you’re not familiar with it. Now that we’ve gotten that out of the way, let’s get to the point.
Tough Love
This man caused a great deal of harm to his own daughter, but he taught her a valuable, albeit dark, lesson. In their country, theft is a big deal, and the sooner she realizes this, the better. What a depressing world we now inhabit.
Generation X-Rated
Someone will occasionally start talking about something and then casually drop a huge bombshell in the middle of it, hoping you won’t notice. However, our attention is usually drawn right away, and we can’t help but wonder, “Can you repeat that?”
Generation X-Rated
This guy made the mistake of thinking that no one would notice his beheading reference in the middle of his Twitter feed. What a fantastic time we live in! ( Or, not).
Putting the “End” in Man’s Best Friend
Many dog owners will tell you that losing their “best friend” is gut-wrenching. Unfortunately, we all have to say goodbye to our beloved pets at some moment in time.
Putting The “End” In Man’s Best Friend
But one Twitter user became cynical, claiming that no matter what, we will eventually lose our dog, and that it will usually be in a decade or so. We already know he’s technically correct, so no need to remind us! Enjoy every moment you have with your dog.
Stick to Astrophysics, Neil
There are many celebrities and great thinkers who use social media to share their knowledge with the rest of the world. While Neil deGrasse Tyson is full of it, he frequently resorts to trolling his millions of followers with dark, but funny, jokes.
Stick To Astrophysics, Neil
To be honest, the following statement is self-evident, but Neil is well aware that many people would attempt this experiment simply to disprove him. Readers, a word of caution: don’t try this at home.
A Heartbreaking Joke
And here is another example of a joke that soon turned into a morbid joke. As we grow older, we place a greater emphasis on maintaining a healthy heart rate.
A Heartbreaking Joke
However, it appears that this individual does not fully comprehend what it means to have a heart rate of 65 beats per minute. “Only 65 to go” could be interpreted in two ways. Either they’re ecstatic to get it down to zero, or they’re heartbroken.
I Have a Bone to Pick With You
The things we write on Twitter can be darkly profound at times, and dark at other times. In just a few words, this tiny little tweet tells a pretty impressive story.
I Have A Bone To Pick With You
This guy is apparently talking to someone about the phenomenon of skeletons and their relationship with the spooky festival on a day that isn’t Halloween. He’s obviously doing something wrong, and the person with whom he’s speaking is a cop.
Global Warning
This tweet exemplifies how insane people can become when given specific information. On the one hand, many people are quick to react irrationally when they are presented with a prediction that lacks scientific backing.
Global Warning
People, on the other hand, remain strangely calm when science finally kicks in and the evidence is there to back it up. Come on, people, global warming has arrived, and we need to act now!
Who’s Helping Who?
On the surface, we’d like to believe that we’d gladly assist those in need, particularly those who don’t have a home and are forced to live on the streets. Unfortunately, a large number of homeless people turn to illegal substances to cope with the stress of their situation.
Who’s Helping Who?
This person brought up the problem of giving money to a homeless person and not knowing where it would end up. However, it appears that the homeless man is better off with the money!
What a Load of Clap
There’s a widespread perception that getting around London is a chilly experience. For starters, people on the tube refuse to speak to one another and will not even look each other in the eyes.
What A Load Of Clap
No one joined in when this little boy decided to clap his hands and sing a happy song. We’re not saying this is always the case in London, but it certainly helps to perpetuate the stereotype!
Making Dreams Come True
Not everyone is meant to be a parent in this world. It’s a harsh reality of life. That isn’t to say that some people can’t help others become parents if they so desire it.
Making Dreams Come True
This man told a dark story (probably a joke) about leaving his nephew in an Uber taxi because the driver couldn’t have children. It’s a win-win situation for everyone involved. The Uber driver is now a father and no longer has to deal with his annoying nephew!
This Joke’s Off the Hook
These days, it’s so easy to offend people. Whatever you say to someone, it seems like there’s a chance it’ll irritate them. Captain Cook, Peter Pan’s arch-enemy, has feelings, too.
This Joke’s Off The Hook
Even the most nefarious villains in the world have a soul, as this little bit of fictional dialogue on Twitter perfectly demonstrates. Captain Hook, like everyone else, deserves to be appreciated.
The School of Hard Knocks
Some people will go to any length to gain the respect of those in their immediate environment. Even so, nothing beats having your love for your children returned to you.
The School Of Hard Knocks
All parents want to feel appreciated by their children, whether it’s something nice they said about you to someone else or a kind gesture. This father felt his child’s love, but he only did a minor thing in the process.
Weirdest Family Reunion Ever
Teenagers will be teenagers, and for lack of a better term, they will become “adventurous.” This means that teenagers may be caught red-handed doing all sorts of indecent things by their parents every now and then.
Weirdest Family Reunion Ever
While watching a movie, this kid came across an inappropriate scene. We don’t believe the father who found them had been missing for 12 years — it’s more likely an exaggeration than anything else.
Better Late Than Never…Very Late
In theory, the notion that it’s never too late to pursue your dreams is very inspiring. It’s reassuring to believe that there will always be time to do what you want, even later in life.
Better Late Than Never…Very Late
This person, on the other hand, threw people for a loop by highlighting some truly heinous villains who waited hundreds, if not thousands, of years to simply commit acts of evil. We see where you’re coming from, Angry Robot, but yikes!
Bad Cop, Bad Cop
We currently live in a climate in which the police have been subjected to a great deal of scrutiny, which is entirely justified. Over the last few years, there has been a great deal of injustice that has impacted people from all walks of life. We expect the police to maintain order rather than cause more havoc.
Bad Cop, Bad Cop
This tweet demonstrates how someone became disillusioned with the police force, believing they were one thing but seeing them as something entirely different as a result of years of experience and exposure.
I Get a Kick Out of You
When a mother is pregnant, it is common knowledge that her baby kicks from within. However, it appears that the kicking this guy is referring to is quite different. It’s a ridiculous comparison to use to justify his behavior.
I Get A Kick Out Of You
We’re guessing he didn’t actually kick anyone and is posing as a man who did. People who actually do this, in either case, must feel the full force of the law. Without a doubt.
Self Care to the Max
We live in a time when the term “self-care” appears to be a popular catchphrase. It’s important to focus on yourself and shut off all of your responsibilities every now and then, whether it’s through yoga, going to a spa, or simply taking some time off.
Self Care To The Max
However, when each act became more outrageous, this person took things to a whole new level. Changing your name and relocating to another country isn’t exactly self-care.
Talk About Quick Fixes
There appear to be a plethora of tips and methods for getting in the best physical shape or, at the very least, undergoing some sort of drastic physical transformation. But, what exactly works, and what is just a desperate attempt by a company to defraud its customers?
Talk About Quick Fixes
The following deal appears to fulfill both requirements. This Photoshop tool appears to have a 100% success rate unless you actually want people to meet you and see you in the flesh.
You Are What You Drink
Cannibalism is a disgusting idea on any level. This strange habit has been the subject of entire movies and books. Despite this, it can be found in animated children’s shows such as this one.
You Are What You Drink
The next character appears to be a humanoid orange of some sort. As you can see, they had no idea they were drinking a cup of their own “blood,” which certainly elevates the term “blood orange” to new heights.
That’s Good News, Right?
Even in the best of circumstances, no one wants to learn that they have been diagnosed with a serious illness. What’s more, do you know what’s even worse? That’s right, finding out you’re a carrier of a disease that’s extremely rare.
That’s Good News, Right?
In theory, this means that being cured, or even treated, will be much more difficult. Then the person in this meme was diagnosed with a disease that was so uncommon that they were given the opportunity to name it!
Too Much Information, Mo
Venn diagrams can teach us a lot if we use them correctly. It’s amazing to see how many things overlap that don’t appear to have anything in common on paper. Of course, “collecting skins” in these two contexts means something entirely different.
Too Much Information, Mo
The sick, twisted comment that this young man provided us with, however, adds a whole new level of darkness to the post. Wait a second, if you’re referring to yourself as “us,” that means… Oh no!
I Made You!
There’s no denying that, from time to time, fully grown adults can be just as immature as their own children. However, hurling insults at them because they annoy you is going too far.
I Made You!
We don’t believe this father’s jab at his son will have the desired effect. One, sharing any aspect of your “bedroom” life with your children is somewhat inappropriate. Second, it’s likely that the son will think it’s disgusting!
Time to Save Face
To be honest, a lot of the suggestions on this list seem like common sense when it comes to reinventing yourself. After all, there are only advantages to drinking a lot of water every day. Sleeping for more than eight hours per day can also be harmful.
Time To Save Face
Not to mention that going outside once a day to soak up some sun is also a good idea. The penultimate item on this list, however, is not something we would recommend.
What to Expect When You’re Not Expecting
When he mentioned that his girlfriend was “eating for two,” most people who read the following tweet were bound to be excited for him. When this expression is used, it usually means that the woman involved is pregnant, which is usually a cause for celebration.
What To Expect When You’re Not Expecting
But it wasn’t long before it became clear that this seemingly innocuous phrase meant something entirely different. Always read all the way to the bottom of a tweet.
That’s Not Gonna Fly
Planes are one of those places where you can literally run into anyone from any background. As a result, people of all ages can board almost any flight. This applies to babies, the elderly, and everyone in between.
That’s Not Gonna Fly
Some people, such as the man in this story, only fly for the first time later in life. The person who told the joke makes you believe that he is going to do something nice for the elderly person. However, this is not the case.
Grade ‘A’ Prank
You’d think that getting $500 for each A you get in school is a great deal. Simply put your head in the game and hit the books every night, and you’ll be the wealthiest kid in your class.
Grade ‘A’ Prank
This parent, on the other hand, made a similar arrangement with his own children because he has no faith in their academic abilities. If you ask us, that’s terrible. Also, why would you be willing to part with $500 in the hopes of your child receiving an A?
A Paranormal Medic
When you were a kid, did you ever play the board game Operation? Well, it appears that this young lady continued to enjoy playing it as she grew older. However, it appears that she ended up playing the game with a real body!
A Paranormal Medic
It’s fine to have dreams. However, it is more common to aspire to be a doctor and then learn how to perform life-saving surgeries on those in need, rather than the other way around.
Survival of the Meanest
The following story — at least the first part of it — will resonate with many of us. You’re out shopping at your neighborhood grocery store, and something you really need, like milk or bread, is almost out of stock.
Survival Of The Meanest
You and a senior citizen are staring at the store’s last two loaves of bread. What exactly do you do? We’d recommend either giving each person a loaf or, more admirably, giving the elderly customer both loaves. But that’s not the case.
Game Over
Many people underestimate the importance of video games to some people. If you’re in a relationship with someone who enjoys playing PlayStation or Xbox, you’re in for a treat.
Game Over
The following question elicited a terrifying response from this individual. We understand how annoying it is when someone interrupts your video game play, but this reaction seems a little too extreme for its own good. You just have to realize what’s important in life at some point.
Who’s a Good Boy?
Service dogs are unquestionably among the most amazing animals on the planet. Consider this: they are specially trained to assist blind people in navigating the world, so they are warmly welcomed.
Who’s A Good Boy?
They’re also beautiful. This is where the next villain comes into the picture. To think they’d use this adorable dog’s abilities to steal a wallet from a blind person. What a nightmare!
Earth’s Protectors
When children ask these comical and sweet questions about the world around them, it’s absolutely adorable. Often, the result is funny, especially if you’re having trouble coming up with a proper response without laughing.
Earth’s Protectors
The issue arises when you realize you don’t have children, or when they squint their obsidian black eyes and inquire about Earth’s defense system. In our opinion, this is pretty creepy.
Talking Carrots
Consider simply walking down an aisle in the supermarket one day in search of your favorite fresh produce. Carrots are what you’re looking for. Carrots, to be sure, but not just any carrots. You’re fascinated by genetically modified carrots for some reason.
Talking Carrots
Perhaps you’re trying to avoid buying carrots that have been genetically modified. So the most logical thing to do is inquire about the carrots you’re holding in your hand with the vendor. You didn’t expect the answer to come from the carrots themselves, did you?
Good to Go
They always say not to drink and drive, and with good reason. You don’t want to get into an accident or be stopped by the cops. But if you do, just pull out the trumpet from under the seat and show them how good you are at playing it.
Good To Go
You can apparently get away with it if you can show the cop that you can play the trumpet! We’re joking; something like this would most likely only happen in a cartoon.
Are You an Only Child?
It can be difficult to grow up with siblings. So the obvious solution is to simply inform your parents that you do not wish to receive any. If you’re their favorite child, they’ll probably tell them to go to the tool shed in the backyard.
Are You An Only Child?
It’s also possible that they’ll simply let someone adopt them; wouldn’t that work? Obviously, your siblings will take it to heart, but they will grow accustomed to sharing the doghouse with the family dog.
Leave the Crust
When you hear someone say they don’t eat the crust, what’s the first thing that comes to mind? You’d most likely think of bread. While we don’t understand these individuals, it’s a different story when it comes to watermelons.
Leave The Crust
Why then would you not want to eat the rind (or crust) of a watermelon? This is a complete waste of resources. What if it’s green, hard, and different in texture?
You Are What You Eat
Our mothers used to tell us not to lie when we were kids. We realized as we grew older that they were wrong. You don’t always have a choice but to obfuscate the truth. In this case, it appears that the opposite is true.
You Are What You Eat
In a technical sense, they are right. They should plead not guilty if you are, proverbially speaking, what you eat. We are not allowed to give legal advice because we did not attend law school.
Ask the Dog
It’s not fun to have marital issues. These disagreements can sometimes lead to an ugly divorce. Divorce is difficult because deciding who gets to keep the dog is difficult. Yes, the jean-clad canine.
Ask The Dog
But, based on the reaction of the wife, we’re sure she’d gladly give it up, we mean the husband. To be honest, we don’t see anything wrong with purchasing Dad’s favorite puppy jeans. During the winter, he gets cold! And that, kids, is how you end up divorced.
Love Birds
This sounded like something out of a Fast & Furious movie. We understand that being with your significant other isn’t always easy. They can be quite irritating at times. They can be so annoying that you want to throw them out of a fast-moving vehicle.
Love Birds
A few bumps on the head (when they hit the tarmac) might help them straighten out. However, we hope this was not part of a larger kidnapping plot. We don’t want to have to explain ourselves to the cops.
Magnetic Love
Assume you’re going on a romantic vacation to Paris with your partner. You intend to stay in the city for a few days and see all of the major tourist attractions. You plan to get down on one knee and propose when you arrive at the famous Eiffel Tower.
Magnetic Love
That is, at least, what they believe. Why would you bend like that if you didn’t have to? If your knee is made of magnets, that explains everything – so no marriage proposal for you, Sara.
Keep Going
We’re aware of what they’ve told you. Life is short, so you should take risks and try new things. Yes, we hate to break it to you, but most of us spend our days daydreaming about all the wonderful things we could accomplish without actually doing them.
Keep Going
What is the reason for this? We don’t know, but we’ve come to terms with the fact that life is what it is. That’s why we agree that you should never approach your crush directly. She probably doesn’t even recognize your name.
No Refund, No Return
The thing about kids is that they aren’t like a store-bought item. It’s too late to go back once you’ve gotten them. They are yours for the rest of your life. It doesn’t even stop when they reach the age of 18.
No Refund, No Return
Whether you like it or not, you’re bound for life. You can, however, regret your decision and say you don’t want them on rare occasions. We understand. Kids can be a handful at times. So go ahead and tell them that and wait to see what happens.
Stalker Boyfriend
Some people are incapable of letting go. It’s difficult to break up with someone you’ve been dating. But all wounds, including romantic ones, heal with time. Some, on the other hand, refused to accept this and refused to move on.
Stalker Boyfriend
This frequently results in situations like this one. He was only trying to be courteous to her. So, like the creepy stalker he is, he was hiding behind the bushes – no big deal. At the very least, he was polite!
What Did You Say?
Even when they are old enough to have children and act like adults, men will always be boys at heart (they never do). Someone couldn’t seem to cope with the fact that their husband is a big baby in this case.
What Did You Say?
We’re not sure what he did to deserve that reprimand (our mothers have said it a few times). It’s possible that it was related to his attempt to break the world record for the most gummy bears stuffed into one’s mouth.
Keep Dreaming
After a breakup, nothing feels better than making your ex feel bad. What better way to do it than to trick them into believing that you are still thinking about them?
Keep Dreaming
It’s simple to do with men because they will believe almost anything a girl says. This is what happens when you don’t use your brain effectively in the first place.
Whose Baby Is It?
These days, it appears that a baby is included as standard equipment on planes. There was always a baby on board, no matter how many times we flew. For some reason, it had to cry all the time.
Whose Baby Is It?
We’re sure some parents would welcome the chance to leave their child with someone else for a few hours. In this case, the plan appears to have been similar. Sadly, you can’t do it.
What the Fork?
We’ve all done it before: sent the incorrect message to the incorrect recipient. Is there anything more awkward than sending an unintended message to one of your parents? Furthermore, this person accidentally sent a nasty message to her father.
What The Fork?
Her father’s reaction, on the other hand, caught her off guard. He defended her actions and gave some sound advice. Although fathers are expected to love their children unconditionally, this goes too far.
Sorted for Life
Don’t we all wish we could reach a point in our lives where we have enough money to not need to work another day? Isn’t that what we’re trying to accomplish? Working isn’t required.
Sorted For Life
Simply put, live your life to the fullest and take advantage of all the resources available to you. This guy’s tweet seemed promising at first, but when we realized he was simply being cynical about his life, it hit us like a ton of bricks.
Spice Up Your Love Life
Dark humor isn’t just for real-life social media posts. A scene from the popular television show The Office can be seen below. To be fair, things start to get pretty dark when you start discussing your private life fantasies with coworkers.
Spice Up Your Love Life
But it’s Michael Scott’s (Steve Carrell) follow-up remark that adds a new dimension to this already hilarious scene. We don’t think it’s a good idea to talk about such things at work any time soon.
Like Father, Like Son
It’s all too easy to be a little sloppy around your kids. After all, they’re so small, and you’re so big as a parent. This man, on the other hand, should have known better than to smack his child with a single pillow across the room.
Like Father, Like Son
Sure, it would be hilarious if it happened in a Looney Tunes episode, but in real life? It appears to be nothing short of a nightmare. One of the jokes on this list that isn’t quite as dark as the others is this one. It is, however, significant.
Happy Wife, Happy Life
It’s hard to deny that the pandemic has wreaked havoc on the lives of so many people. Not only have people died as a result of our social isolation, but many relationships have suffered as well.
Happy Wife, Happy Life
Consider the stress that people who were having affairs at the time of the outbreak must have felt. You are suddenly forbidden from seeing that person with whom you were having a side conversation. At times, life can be very difficult.